The Popycan and other such junk

Friday night, David took the 3 older kids camping. I stayed at home with the baby so she wouldn't get frostbite. Saturday afternoon we had invited all of the youth and youth leaders to our place for a BBQ. Saturday, when the party was about to start, David was on his way home from the campsite and I was sitting on the couch reading my scriptures.
This is where the story begins.

Version 1: A version of faith (from my perspective at home)
I get a frantic call from Elijah, "Mom, Dad was stopped and is getting a ticket."
I hear David yelling in the background, "Caroline, they are taking the car to the pound because I won't pay a bribe."
Hangup.
I read me scriptures more furiously and pray fervently.
I text David, "Don't get mad. Stay calm. I love you."
David calls, "I forgot my license so this could get bad for me when they find out."
I think, why the heck didn't they ask for your license before anything else? Shouldn't that be the first order of business?
More prayers, bc taking 3 kids and a carfull of camping gear to the pound could get sticky.
David calls,"It's done now. He took me to another cop who wrote me up."
SALVATION!!!
Lots of prayers of thanks.

Version 2: A version of horror. 
After the squall dies, David showers, and we greet all of our guests. Then I get the real, horrifying story.
The cop stops David and asks for a bribe bc our registry sticker is overdue. David refuses and gives him a Donald-Trump-esque lecture. Cop threatens. We find out later that cars can't be taken to the pound for that infraction and a cop suggesting otherwise is punishable by law. Ok, David's next move is quite possibly the stupidest thing he's ever done...maybe except for beating up a big black man on a Manhattan subway, or maybe the dancing sock, or then again, there's throwing the bikes in the canal, and the car crash on the Huey P. Long, or flipping the borrowed truck several times, oh dangit, this is getting out of hand! Lets just say that if there was a news helicopter above them, they would have been filming.
David put the pedal to the metal. He tried to escape from the cop! The problem is that David was in a Honda Pilot and the cop was not. Hello! I'm not sure how long this went on, but can we just keep in mind that there were children in the backseat? My children.
So the cop catches up to him and says, "What are you doing?"
David, "We're going to the pound right? Let's go."
The cop leads him to another cop who pretends he needs 1500 pesos for the multa. David gives him 1300, comes home, tells me the story, and I become physically ill.

This is where I want to put those cops and this story and bribes and dog crap:

PS. In case you were wondering, we now have to pay the real, actual, genuine fine in addition to the "I'm a filthy, lying cop so give me all you have" fine we already paid.
PPS. I still love David a whole lot, even though he's a bit jumpy and makes me physically ill at times.